dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
she met some random, took his vcard, peed in his bed, left, and then requested him as her boyfriend on facebook
Just getting around to doing laundry. Jesus there's a lot of blood on my birthday dress.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
I ate the snowman's head. That is not a drug euphemism.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
Thought I was doing makeup today for a photo shoot for a short film. WRONG. Try I'm on the set for a Fucking Sci-Fi PORN.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
Randomize