your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
He's getting better. i'm using GuitarHero to teach him how to finger me. My clit = the red tab.
he breathalyzed me before we had sex.
You tried to tell me you weren't high while you were eating French onion dip out of the jar with a spoon
We are taking shots for every green Lon-Capa box we get for the homework.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Wow. I feel like a bad friend. My fuckbuddy wished you a happy birthday before I did. The reality of that just hit me.
In the bath trying to absorb water through my skin because I can't drink it.. That hungover
I felt like... 50% confused and 50% like a slow roasted flip flop.
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Randomize
