i just dont know how to see an unattractive person as more than a friend
sometimes you just have to masturbate at your friend's house.
trsut me youll find me, im the only kanye west here and every1 is chanting dbag at me
i cleaned the weed out of my bowl, pretended it was a spoon and ate oatmeal with it. my mom cried
My three rules on what I'm wearing tonight. Something short, something see through, and something i had sex in.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
I'm still pretty drunk right now, but when this hangover hits me, I'm going to be super pissed. It's a preemptive never drinking again.
And by "I love him" I mean "I want his tongue down my throat.
Turns out my mom didn't really want to know I was in a new dimension last night from smoking so much.
Damn. Looks like nobody I know is doing anything interesting. Guess it's another slut-it-up-with-strangers sort of night.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
