sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
This cougar at my work just said "big breasts" referring to poultry... Still resulted in a boner.
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
you made me "pop lock and drop it" as a sobriety test last night..
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
I told her my hands felt like they touched the sun, never been that stoned before
There is a video of you making out with him, flipping off the camera, and holding the plastic flamigo that you had just stolen out of a yard
Can you explain the Transformers set up for battle in my living room?
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Randomize
