would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
I decided it would be a good time to smoke on one of my deliveries but then I got the munchies and ate a piece of the pizza I was freaking out so I told him it was our new pacman pizza
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
you pushed her into a kiddie pool and knocked out her front teeth... and you still managed to get laid. what. the. fuck.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
Just puke out the sadness. Like a fuckin dragon.
He said I looked like a ballsack and I tried to choke him out with my Ghostbusters pajama pants. Happy fucking Halloween.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
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