I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
How is it that lesbians won't hit on me at a gay club, but they'll hit on me every time I go to Walmart?
nyquil sex gave me 6 orgasms so I support that
i just opened a bottle of wine with my dads power tools
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
who sends a dick pic at 3 am on a sunday honestly
seriously. and now it'll take him hours to clean up the glitter
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize
