the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
Turns out puking in your mask makes it even harder to see out of the mask..
She walked in on her brother jacking off and she hasn't been the same since. She's been crying and shaking non-stop. It's been two weeks.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I wish I could just hang out in ERs.
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I told my parents how nice the girl at the frogurt store was. I neglected to mention that I nearly lost my virginity to her via foursome.
Haha just talked to the dude you bit on Thursday. He has been growing a beard to hide the bruising....
YOU ARE STRONGER THAN YOUR VAGINA
Where you been?
Please tell me this is a booty call
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize