I wish life had little blips of pornography
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
basically at this point ill snort whatever you put in front of me and just hope
He's 11. You dont draw dicks on 11 year olds, i dont care if he ate your lasagna
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Contents of my pockets this morning: phone, condom, one hoop earring, half a cheeseburger, lighter and a $87 receipt from tacobell. Time for work.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You went through my pantry and left one of everything in the box. One cracker. One cheesit. One piece of cereal. I really fucking hate you.
That accounts for only three of the penises
almost just sent your mom a dick pic. almost.
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
One of these days I would like to go out drinking and stick to plan of just getting drunk and not be sidetracked with other people's plans of doing drugs along the way. I didn't even want to not feel my teeth tonight but here we go just another Thursday night when you live I live
Randomize