Me too ba-by. I wanna bite your ear lobes they are so fat.
yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
I woke up with no pants, someone elses shirt, but my new years crown still on. That is dedication.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
If one of us has to be polite I guess I won't sneak out while he's in the shower
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I found a guy who will take me to the Olive Garden and he is CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
