You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
this is the last time we take the mathletes drinking.
I'm convinced my penis is the only thing holding this relationship together.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
he could've at least fucked me twice. that's just common courtesy.
Our apt smells like hot shit marinated in oregano and cumin. No more taco truck dinner, fuck face. The wall paper is peeling.
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
I want to share a beverage of the alcoholic category with you, but I'm conflicted about getting out from under my covers.
Is it wrong that I get drunk and let him eat me out then fall asleep? He offers me so much and yet I do nothing. I feel like a republican.
She showed me her tits outside Taco Bell....After she flashed the dude working there in an effort to get in.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
