Who knew there were guys that wanted to only stalk you instead of date you? Count on me to find them!
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
The bars here don't close until 4!
my legs don't close until 4
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
Blood. All over. Pre coke adventure needs to slow down unless I'm involved
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
I'm going to tattoo a maze on my back for the next fucker that tries to blow early ....
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
Right, try not to commit a felony that costs more than 4 dollars cause that's all I have in my bail jar.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Nothing quite like spending your evening singing Shania Twain I Feel Like a Woman barbershop quartet Style with some homeless guys outside of Keyport liquor. love Shania Twain. How's your Sunday?
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