You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
Apparently the guard had to repeat "you're too drunk to get in" three times before I understood. I guess he was right.
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
I know you all think its cute to drop me off in a different state when I black out, but I can't wake up in family campgrounds asking where I am. These parents are scared.
I would be down to associate sex w taco bell
You do it and I'll burn these mermaid pants so help me God.
My bookbag can hold 30+ beers. They shoulda put that on the tag bc its a big selling point
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
My penis is lonely
So is my ring finger
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