Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
some dude is getting blown right outside the bar in his car. reeediculous
class
he's dribbling her head like he's fucking allen iverson
my debutante medallion kept hitting his balls when i went down on him
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
I love shooting for the middle. Those girls never wake up well.
Apparently drinking in your car before going into a sales meeting is frowned upon. We are car sales men not doctors.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
I can't even masturbate without crying fuck this break up
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Ran out of eye drops right after putting them in one eye. Half baked at work.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
From the bottom of my heart, thanks for never sending me unsolicited dick picks.
Straight up last night my mom was like josh you need to find a job that doesn't include the selling or transporting of drugs
Randomize
