4:25 am: I want you here. Ugh.
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
the fact that i fell through a skylight is the least humiliating part of the night
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
Hey will pizza rolls help if you accidentally get a diabetic chihuahua drunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im eating a cannibus peanut butter and jelly sandwich, while snuggling a stuffed animal. Either this flu is really really harsh or I'm some kind of stoner toddler
I should start wearing my Batman shirt more often when I drink. Good things happen. All sorts of shit.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
You were so drunk you told some dude your life story in one short sentence... and kissed his fiancé. You're invited to the wedding.
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