Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
He just stood there...Helen Keller and I could have had a more interesting conversation
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
I just took a shit in a BP station. It seemed appropriate since they are shtting in our ocean.
You know what sound is wonderful for a hangover? Listening to the horns from the South Africans at the world cup
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
Just used the "Buddy" Poppy flower I got from a veteran to clean my one hitter. "I'm proud to be an American"
Who breaks their ankle the day before a beach wedding? This guy. Maybe this is karma for fucking someone's wife? Idk.
I think he just shit his pants. Yep he did. That's unfortunate.
So you just held his hand and he fucking came...?
her and her boyfriend kept giving me coke ad kissing me talking about my awesome boobs
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