I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Beer lympzucs are ki7lling me
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
i will not be out-irished. not this night. if i don't wake up tomorrow handcuffed to a hospital bed, i have failed my ancestors.
I've literally NEVER been on a date or gotten through one episode of netflix without having sex like I JUST WANT TO WATCH TRUE DETECTIVE
Do you guys think there will be a coke-for-Molly barder at bonnaroo?
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Going overboard is basically 75% of my personality
I'm a gorgeous hot mess
I think I sent pictures of my boobs to an Olympic athlete...
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
ugffhh I have work in 4 hours and have recieved zero sleep, seeing that I'm trapped in the arms of a snoring bear man. can't. breathe. lost in the forestry of his chest hair.
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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