this is a family affair. You're an embarrassment.
whatever it's not my family
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I literally might walk of shame home on a cable car. If that doesn't scream San Francisco I don't know what does
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Let's paint friendship bongs
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
You kept me hostage in your driveway until you got your point across that alaska has warm weather
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
It's just unfortunate. She's a 28 year old woman who looks as if a pelican and ET had a baby. With braces.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Btw "you gettin a workout in" isn't a great gym pickup line. Like no I'm fucking grabbing lunch on my way to class.
I drank all the wines... and all th Doritos. Whilst watching Fat Camp. I need to reassess my values.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
Randomize
