Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
Dude WTF? His teammate just started talkin to me on fb! Am I walking around with a "I like to f**k gators" on my forehead?
No, it just says ur easy
he broke up with me so i peed in his bed
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
how drunk are you?
What does that even mean anymore?
It has to be really easy to get midgets drunk.
he said i ruined lesbian porn for him
He also has a monumental penis. It's unbelieveable. I'm sorry but he's perfect.
I woke up covered in sausage cart mustard and champagne
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Her oh Gods turned into oh god I shouldn't be doing this I'm engaged.
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