Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
Come find me please? Im in a ditch.
That doesn't help me much...
I'm right under the moon!
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
Well, she chose the fuckboy life or the life chose her. Not sure which one but either way I don't need that negativity in my life.
New goal find someone I love enough to use these Japanese pancake flavored condoms on
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
Randomize
