I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
after a few more beers I realized that both my wife and I like Latin men.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The roommate asked me to make sure no one fucked in his room. And then preceded to give only me permission to fuck in his room. Had no idea who I was, just thought I was trustworthy cause I had Edward 40 hands. Felt like a Tarantino movie.
Tell me about it. Running across highways take alot outta ya. When he found out, he was all "concerned" about it.
I really shouldn't have to tell you to stop banging your lightsaber on everything while we are in college.
I want to fling myself into the sun
Okay so the couple who keep propositioning people for threeways are def siblings not bf/gf
So are you gonna do it or no you said they're hot
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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