For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
"Tonight I'm turning swine flu into an std" this might be how zombies come about. Peace civilization.
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
my mom hid the smirnoff from me. this is the most fucked up game of hide and seek EVER
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
We took up a collection and paid her $50 to eat a piece of meat. Vegetarian morals trumped once again by cash.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
This time, try to not get fingered in the middle of the living room.
I DIDNT GET FINGERED
I was rubbed
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
Tim and I found you a 5ish and asked how you were doing with the breakup. All you said was "i can't words"
i just used a selfie stick to take an ass pic. i hate myself.
Are you alive? Cause this is my official "im actually alive" text.
Randomize
