I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I really gotta be careful. My email inbox is equal parts notifications from instructors and this dude's dick. If I get drunk and reply to the wrong thing I might get kicked out of grad school.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is not 2004 anymore. It's not acceptable to get fingered while watching 'Ferngully' in a basement full of your friends.
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.
Do u think the bouncer will let me in with a giant stuffed snake?
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
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