maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
I just had one of those moments where i was really sad that i'll never get to be asian.
She sucked her thumb until she was 17. It's like my dick was born to be in her mouth.
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Made a salesman quit his job, a saleswoman cry, and got a manager to half shout "fuck this"....successful drunk Christmas shopping
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
i'm half naked talking to a cat. you don't have to justify your life to me.
I cannot start working out. If I start to look better, I'll ruin ugly women's chances forever. So, really...I'm doing them a favor...think about it.
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
I stopped telling people I'm a pansexual unless they ask first, really tired of explaining what that means.
Randomize
