I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
you went to subway and got pissed when they refused to deep fry your sub
You said that we had to leave the party together and proceeded to repeat the "ducks fly together" speech from The Mighty Ducks word for word. Soon the whole party was quite and started chanting quack..quack...quack..
just found deep spiritual meaning in spongebob.... that high.
do you know how scary it is to wake up in a CATSCAN machine after a night of drinking?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
I thought of you this morning when I woke up in a bed with a girl wrapped in duct tape dressed as a coors light can.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I want to get back to junior year skinny- without all the drugs.
When I go out tonight I need to make sure to be really good. The Easter bunny doesn't deliver to jail
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
sex on a bike is impossible
challenge accepted
there must be tiny pirates in the freezer stealing our rum.
Randomize
