i just got fired from my job because i was "too smart" and my immedate response was i am WAY too stoned to be considered smart, and theni walked out the door.
wow. i have no words.
you make it seem like sunflower seeds and pinot grigio are not in the food pyramid.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
Okay good. And who the fuck put a condom on my foot. That shit hurt
I think I just got a contact from my own exhale. Def dying.
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
I feel like he better crank it up to level RG IV tomorrow. It's the fucking playoffs.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
I hate when pubes grow back. My mons is a warzone.
If your talking about a poncho I WANT ONE
Randomize
