I totally got off with my controler for my ps3. Soooo glad I ended up with that racing game for Christmas.
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I'm hungover as fuck. My vagina hurts. I locked my keys in my car. It's about 93* outside. We're having sex in the pool when I get home
After we were done the second time she turned to me and called me a Hardcore Armadillo. Also, her O face involves crossed eyes. You tell me.
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
The most humiliating part was that I farted while he was tasing me.
i think we watched the dark knight rises after you left but i might have passed out through most of it. I remember crying at the end though. sad tears then happy tears.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
Damn Instagram explore page. I am six months in to some girl I don't even know.
I woke up under a house in Key West
The high school classes are online, not my sex life. He still comes over for “teacher / parent conferences.” A couple more “conferences” and I’ll be able to rewrite the Sex Ed curriculum
Randomize
