hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
just fucked my old babysitter, gotta love block parties
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my advisor is telling us the best way to sneak in alcohol on move in day. I definately picked the right college
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
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So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
On second thought, is it weird that I scheduled a surgery that determines my fertility around lingerie football night? I might have fucked up priorities.
Absolutely not. I would have done the exact same thing.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
All I remember is you shouting "THIS KID IS A FREAKIN' NINJA!!" when he dive rolled over a barbed wire fence and proceeded to ask for his 18th beer.
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