When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
Nothing like studying in the College of Communication to make you realize how smart you are.
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
Makin mac and cheese without you. Definitely seem to do this better inside you. Splashed boiling water on my cock
Can we have a celebratory fuck now that the lockout is over?
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
There is a reason for guards on beard trimmers I just clipped a wrinkle on my sack so much blood
Why is it so hot and why are these the only pants in my life.
dude he's still passed out in my bathtub. and his dick is half way in a 40 bottle... i really hope he was just trying to piss in it
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
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