If you're really into hairy Serbian chicks, Cleveland has a lot to offer(216): We're going to cougar night, the serbian chicks are the best aged.
So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He gave me his business card. It was a Justin Bieber trading card with his number written in sharpie. I have to call him don't I?
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Yeah...I know. It's cute I think...I mean cute in a weird like hey I kinda took you home from the bar one night, maybe criticized your penis, and fucked your brains out...kinda sorta way
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
Are you really surprised she can't remember? That's like 50 people. I couldn't rattle off all 50 state capitols off the top of my head, you're bound to forget a few here and there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had to sit there with his three fat aunts talking about a bunch of 50 Shades knockoff books.
I felt like a taxi, but my meter was running up minutes he would be eating me out that night.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
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