Wearing these hooker shoes was a mistake
I just got a bj @ my old preschool...my childhood memories r all ruined
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
I'm not considering your visit a success until we've fucked every cock in the ethnic rainbow...between the four of us we should have it done by x-mas
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Dude, get out of Andrea's vagina and call me back
I think I heard my penis growl. Wanna do lunch?
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
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