so he expects you to be his vegas whore for the season. nice.
all i wanna do is slam about 38 beers eat a whole pizza and wake up naked in the taco bell parking lot
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
I take back everything bad I said about that song party in the usa. There's just something about seeing a cross dresser lipsing it that makes a song sooo much better.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
Would it be weird if I told you I thought of you when I masturbated?
Looks like I'm more than just your Mexico mistake...
We have to use a contraceptive. God help the world if another one of us comes into fruition.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
I haven't even sucked a boob is 6 weeks I hate not college
After this week, alcohol is mandatory.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
