birth control should be required to get into college
I woke up on a raft in a bath tub filled with beer. excellent night.
you inspire me to be a worse person
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
There's mini weenies and empanadas everywhere...
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Also, I found this app that is basically a tamagochi from the 90's and now I finally have something to keep me busy at work!
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
I'm so drunk I forgot what to do to go pee.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
