did I really admit that id have sex with that cougar had I been more drunk?...ugh...i need to masterbate more
Pretty sure somebody just said 'I used to have a nipple'
that's awkward
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a fat chick ask the bartender to top her corona off with grenandine cuz she has a "sweet tooth" no that's diabetes fatty
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
I'm drinking with a guy who is a bigger asshole than me. We started a contest.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
I'm trying to get laid this Halloween, not inspire the next season of AHS
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
Well, if I’m not getting dick or sleep then I’m not interested.
My brothers dog was hit by a car and died. They're really sad about it.
But they're having a baby! It's like a dog only 40 billion times worse!
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
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