Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Last night must have been awesome, my dog still smells like vomit.
Crying in the liquor store is not a good look
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
I'm sitting in the shotgun seat of my car on full recline trying to pretend everything is ok
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
90% sure the total babe I have been talking to all night has a kid. Ugh, so sad right now.
Im so high
Soooooooo high. David tried to rinse the water droplets out of the sink for 5 minutes
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
So a bottle of lube exploded all over my softball bag and Nike shirt.
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