the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
This makes me miss penis. Not in a horny way... but in a sad, sentimental way.
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
i wish i could say that was the first 40 year old woman from the circus I nailed
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