You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
i think i recognize dicks better than faces
He spent most of his night trying to convince people that he had changed and was no longer a sleazebag...he had his nut hanging out of his pants about an hour later.
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
work has become about six times more interesting since i started fucking my boss.
I have a theory he's part Neanderthal
No. 70% of the female population would find them attractive. The other 30% are lesbian and even they would appreciate them for their strong bodies and athletic capabilities.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
