Duck Duck Cougar?
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Obviously a higher power wants us to be sunday drunk together
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
The bad news is I fucked my exes girlfriend. The good news is I100% understand why he left me
It was kicking off big time until you crawled out the bar on your hands and knees. Nobody wanted to mess with that.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Your the only person to come back from spring break with a non std related infection
Seriously. All I want right now is a 40 with a nipple on it, and a nap
Randomize
