Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I know it is almost summer when the students in my night class start showing up drunk.
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Oh my god I haven't had mozzarella sticks since I banged that Applebee's waiter
Trying not to ruin Mother's Day with the enormous hickey on my neck. Nice.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Randomize
