Odds of those being real?
One in who gives a fuck
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
Good news. That bum you thought that died is alive.
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
Randomize
