Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
I woke him up this morning and said I have a meeting w my advisor in an hour you need to wake up, cum on my face, and take me to my car.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
No idea how he made them, but vodka water balloons were a horrible idea.
College has taught me that the "best idea" is rarely the fun one.
This is true but you can't really get fired from college
She was pouring Goldschlager in my mouth during the shower sex. How can you NOT like her?
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I barely trust you with my tinder, why would I let you take the staples out of my head?!
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
dude kate found out i cheated and busted in while i was taking a shit. I was cornered, nothing i could do
so drinking tonight?
Be there in 15
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