I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
I love wearing low cut shirts cuz then when class gets boring, I can look down and admire my breasts.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
google maps should a have a setting for this. like I AM ABANDONING EVERYTHING TO MEET A GIRL WHO IS 10 HOURS OF MILES AWAY. HOW DO WE DO THIS OPTIMALLY?
I really shouldn't be this use to hearing "YOURE THAT GIRL?!?!"
I was wondering why he was in my phone as "Cat Guy", he seemed pretty normal. Then when we woke up he was wearing a shirt with a picture of his cat on it. The name stays.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
God dammit everything I said last night about jungle juice being awesome just does not carry over into the next day
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
I think I am just gonna marry that lesbian. She is more of a respectful gentleman than any of the guys I've slept with.
You couldn’t remember the word hand jibber. Instead, your drunk ass offered the bartenders “unlimited hand fritters” if they wouldn’t cut you off.
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