Let's just have a brief moment of silence for my dignity before we start tonight
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
ejected that DVD during the department meeting.. it was our porn from last night. I have a new nick-name at work.
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
Also txt me when you take your first dump of the year... I'd like to synchronize if that's at all possible.
Is it a bad thing that I've made out with everybody I work with?
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
I'm running late...how do you explain period shits to your boss?
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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