playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
you would pick up someone in the library
oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Our drug dealer just got busted, wear black tmrw
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
I'm so tired I just poured monster in my coffee.
And it tastes incredible.
And I have chest pains.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
Last night he told me I was never sexier than when I was cutting pizza. Seriously. Like, he's perfect.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
Randomize
