I guess what I'm trying to say is you've fucked more people than the economy.
If he comes back to you and I'm left alone in lonelytown I'm totally going to poo on your car.
my fart just smelled so bad i acutally gagged
just because you are now my girlfriend does not mean you can text me nasty shit
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
SLUTTIEST. 4TH. EVER.
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
Woke up in the front yard with a chalupa and a firecracker in my back pocket. It's what the founding fathers would want
im sorry but you know it was a good night when you got tasered on the ass and didnt even feel it
It's kind of like, standing in a garage and pretending you're a car. Except you're naked.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
They kept barging in on us saying random shit. At one point they came in yelling room service! and threw soda at us bruising my foot. Weirdest injury I have gotten during sex.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
I don't think stranger penis made your tonsils bleed
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