I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
My parents just checked my browsing history and now think I'm addicted to porn and am a necrophiliac. 1: I know it was you. 2: You're so dumped, that shit is sick.
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
To my ex and my favorite mistake: I totally enjoyed hearing you have erectile disfunction via baby monitor!
If you do wifi you would be helping my penis out & real friends care about their friends penises...
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
So apparently my mom hired someone who goes by "DJ Dog Dick" for the family christmas party?
bring the pregnancy test and the margarita mix, see you in 15
you're welcome to come here, except my beds from ikea so it's more unstable than i am
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
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