The weather is perfect in Seattle right now. Warm enough for girls to not wear bras, but cold enough for me to see them nipping out in the shade.
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
He puked on the grill while the burgers were on. We had to go to taco bell
I woke up naked in my bathtub at 5:30 this morning. There's legit a spray tan body print of me in the fetal position in my tub.
She keeps telling me I can't keep feeding the dog my food. I gave half the weed brownie to the dog and half to me. I just want it to taste the greatness of cheezits like I am.
Just woke up to find myself in a random bed with two people next to me having sex. I thought it would be awkward to just suddenly get up so i think I'm gonna lie here and pretend I'm still sleeping.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
The highlight of my night was when you proclaimed that the man standing next to you smelt like grape medicine...
Get drunk. Masturbate to his picture. Fall asleep. Repeat. Fuck summer.
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