i barfeds in our rink
I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
There's a sign at Bashas for 30% off of 6 bottles of wine in Friday. That seems like a personal challenge.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
Beer Popsicles are better in theory
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Yeah.. he went to Tebow in the middle of the crosswalk and got hit by a cab... The yellow ones really don't stop
The problem is drunk me is completely unaware how poor I am
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
I realized today that the only things I'm guaranteed to have with me at all times are lipgloss, condoms and a USB drive. hmmm...
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
