i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
ohhh my god. this party should be titled "my hookups of summers past" be expecting some good stories tomorrow
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
So then I sent a pic msg of the Magnum XL box to her friend
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
I never want to hear the words unlimited shots for boobs in the same sentence ever again.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
First morning at school this semester and I threw up in a bush during my walk of shame.
I asked him to get me another beer, and he started making muffins.
Randomize
