Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
It was all about her orgasm last night. I felt like a human dildo.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
I wound up running down the street in 12 degree weather in just my bra and then fell asleep cuddling my bottle. You tell me how last night went.
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
strip teases shouldnt end with an expensive car covered in salsa and mayonnaise yet here we are
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I did a trust fall off the bar and then almost got into a knife fight over a push up competition. Just another Tuesday.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
He calculated like a serious conversion in his head the other day and got a crazy number and I was like damn that’s hot please proceed to take your clothes off.
Randomize
