Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
She asked if my windows were tinted enough for road head.
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
I'm lying topless with an eye infection at the foot of my bed with a dog between my legs. With disney in the background. Its one of those 3 am moments
he told me it was nice to see me not blacked out mumbling to myself in the front seat, I told him it was nice to see him not in handcuffs.
Please come home, i don't want to feel like basket garbage girl but I'm in your alleyway and not sure how to change that.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
We're going to ride the bus of mixed signals all the way to unrequited love town and that's where I'm going to live my life and then die.
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
I mean the power was out what was I supposed to do
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
